The Field Notes

Why You Keep Repeating the Same Pattern, Even After Years of Personal Development

Another relationship has just ended. The same pattern showed up again, the one I thought I'd already done the work on. I loved her. That part was real. And somewhere in the middle of it, the old shape reasserted itself anyway, the pleasing, the trying to be enough,...

What Shadow Work Actually Means (A Plain-English Guide)

The term gets thrown around a lot now, usually with candles in the photo and a caption about healing. I want to tell you what it actually is, because the real version has nothing to do with any of that, and it's a lot more useful than the version you've probably seen...

How to Stop Over-Delivering for Clients Who Are Never Happy

There's a particular kind of tired that comes from doing one more thing for a client who was never going to be satisfied no matter what you handed them. Not the good tired from a hard day's work. The other kind. The kind where you've just delivered something you...

The Night I Let Go of Needing to Be Loved

I was sitting on a bathroom floor in the dark. Alone. Somewhere in the middle of a plant medicine experience that had stripped away every story I'd ever told myself about who I was, and one thing wouldn't let go of me. I wasn't afraid of failing. I'd already proven I...

Why High-Achieving Men Feel So Lonely

I've told the story before about the night I was given one of the highest honours my company handed out. Five thousand people in the room, my name called out, the whole place on its feet. I sat back down next to an empty chair, because the one person I wanted there...

Why Success Feels Empty (Once You Actually Get It)

There were five thousand people in that room. I was being awarded one of the highest honours the company gave out, the first person in Australia to ever reach that level. My name got called, I walked up, and the room stood and cheered. I sat back down next to an empty...
The Warrior is Tired: When It’s Time to Lead Without the Sword

The Warrior is Tired: When It’s Time to Lead Without the Sword

There’s a point in a man’s life, usually after he’s conquered, won, built, and burned, where the fight doesn’t feel noble anymore.  It just feels… heavy. He’s still strong. Still capable. Still sharp."I don't want to fight anymore"But somewhere deep inside, behind the...

The Crown Was Always Yours: Awakening the Inner King at 50

The Crown Was Always Yours: Awakening the Inner King at 50

There’s a story modern men carry. It goes like this: “One day, if I work hard enough, win enough, fix enough, prove enough... I’ll finally feel like a King.” But it’s a lie. One of the most painful ones we’ve inherited. Because here’s the truth no one told us: You...

From Provider to Presider: The Shift Men Must Make After 50

From Provider to Presider: The Shift Men Must Make After 50

There comes a moment in every man’s life, if he’s lucky, where the roles stop working. The role of provider. Protector. Performer. Fixer. Builder. It’s not that they were wrong. It’s that… they’re no longer enough. If you’re over 50, you might feel it already: The...

When Fire Becomes Light: Mastering Rage Without Losing Power

When Fire Becomes Light: Mastering Rage Without Losing Power

There’s a fire inside every man. Not the calm candlelit kind. I’m talking wildfire. Raw.  Untamed.  Ancient. The kind that could burn a house down, or light the way home. Most men are terrified of their rage. Or worse, they’ve buried it so deep they’ve forgotten it’s...